I work on a floor in my building with roughly 100 to 125 people of which a good seventy-five percent are men. There seems to be a large proportion of that male population that has an aversion to urinals and instead prefers to do their business in the stalls. More specifically, on the toilet seats that reside in the stalls. I’m not sure if it’s passive aggression or just a bunch of clueless male engineers. Either way, I am now visiting other floors to surf on my phone. Their Delta Tau Chi name is ‘asshat’.
(language alert!) A few weeks ago, I read a great article by Mark Manson called, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. The gist of the article is to carefully consider whether an asshat or asshat-situation deserve one of your very valuable fucks. Don’t hand out fucks like they are candy. It is much calmer way of thinking and living your life. Now, when some asshat or asshat situation is about to make my blood pressure leak out of my ears, I look them right in the eye and tell them that they do not deserve one of my fucks. In my head, I say this. It’s very freeing and I highly recommend it.
Peter Cook in a post on LinkedIn said, “Leadership is not about stopping things happening and pointless administration.” Same can be said about a process. Good ones keep things moving while making sure the right people are involved and informed. Bad ones, things stop and the pointless paperwork drill begins. Try not to step in the process. It’s a bitch to clean off of your shoes.
I try to keep my PowerPoint slides simple. A few words. Maybe a nice graphic to help get the point across. Sometimes, though, there are those slides that feel like they could bring an indictment for murder. Or at least reckless endangerment.
A recent presentations started out very homicidal. It was ugly. The group pulled together to make improvements by the deadline but it still never was that great. It wasn’t death by PowerPoint but close. It was really uncomfortable-and-miserable-feeling by PowerPoint.
The is from late 2011 but is still an issue I deal with daily. My inner voice is such a debby-downer and is really causing a hit to my confidence. At this point, my self-worth is telling me I should be digging holes somewhere, and that skill is only marginal.
How do you deal with the asshat on your shoulder?
My inner voice is an asshat. And it will not shut up.
There was a commercial a couple years ago. In it, as a lady is preparing a dinner party, her inner voice keeps hinting that she is in over her head, she should have a back-up plan (a caterer), etc.
That’s my inner voice. I go to meetings and it tells me they are much smarter and better qualified than I. In fact, it says, they mock you behind your back. It’s really not helpful.
Alpha males. Alpha dogs. I’m not one of them. They annoy me. Walking around with the chests in permanent ‘puffed-out” position, looking others up and down, sizing up everything – suit, shoes, watch. They’d probably drop trow, if they could, to see how the measure up.
I’m not like that. Some would call me weak but I just figure one can get just as far by making friends instead of destroying people and being a dick. I’d much rather just chill over coffee or a beer. Better way to go through life, don’t you think?