Give Until It Hurts…

(language alert!) A few weeks ago, I read a great article by Mark Manson called, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. The gist of the article is to carefully consider whether an asshat or asshat-situation deserve one of your very valuable fucks. Don’t hand out fucks like they are candy. It is much calmer way of thinking and living your life. Now, when some asshat or asshat situation is about to make my blood pressure leak out of my ears, I look them right in the eye and tell them that they do not deserve one of my fucks. In my head, I say this. It’s very freeing and I highly recommend it.

An Asshat On My Shoulder…

 

The is from late 2011 but is still an issue I deal with daily. My inner voice is such a debby-downer and is really causing a hit to my confidence. At this point, my self-worth is telling me I should be digging holes somewhere, and that skill is only marginal.

How do you deal with the asshat on your shoulder?

A Hard Place…

I drew this back in 2009 right after the last time we endured the national headache that is our Presidential election season. Figured it was a good time to brush off the dust and freshen it up a bit.

Partisan politics gives me a headache. The vitriol. The finger pointing. The ridiculousness that is the extreme fringes of each party (both the Occupiers and the Tea Partiers are a big bunch of asshats).

Colin Cowherd from ESPN Radio said one day recently, “People do not want to be informed. They want to be affirmed.” He is a wise man. No one cares to listen, to compromise, to actually try to solve some problems.

There is little room for us independent centrists and it’s giving me a headache.

That Inner Voice…

My inner voice is an asshat. And it will not shut up.

There was a commercial a couple years ago. In it, as a lady is preparing a dinner party, her inner voice keeps hinting that she is in over her head, she should have a back-up plan (a caterer), etc.

That’s my inner voice. I go to meetings and it tells me they are much smarter and better qualified than I. In fact, it says, they mock you behind your back. It’s really not helpful.

Asshat.

Summer Reruns…

Busy week, busy weekend so no new drawing this time. Summer is the traditional rerun season, anyway, so who am I to fight tradition? The one below is from last year during a particularly fun time at work. Things are much better now, thank you very much. Please enjoy this oldie but goodie.

 

Kitten Cute…

They don’t have to wear their suit of ignorance. it’s enough just to be in general proximity. This one really is speaking to my distaste for the condescension the asshats like to throw around when they are feeling superior. They can be such jerks.

Gone Fishing…

A friend at work offered a book he thought I would like, Shift by Peter Arnell, a big-time marketing guy in NYC. The book is pretty good, it is more about his struggle to go from over 400 pounds down to circa 150 (awesome feat, imho) but throws in some good life and business tidbits, as well.

His grandfather worked the fish markets in New York and would tell him this quite often, sometimes literally in regards to fishing and others, life. It resonated with me as I become more involved in business development in my company. I am trying to find where the fish are biting and then gently nudge management in that direction.

For a brief moment, I considered sending this drawing to Mr. Arnell and sharing what I said above. Then I read some stories that paint him to be an asshat. My fantasy of him loving my work and showering me with praise and being my new best friend melted into cease and desist orders and screaming into phones. Extreme, I know. He comes across as very charming in his book, very likeable, but that is easy to do in a book (or in a blog with stupid drawings) but a real jerk-wad in real life. Granted, the stories were few (and there were a fair share of positive ones) but why open myself up to that. I have enough asshats yelling at me.

What do you think? Share or keep our little secret?

A Horse to Water…

An old boss said this once several years and it really stuck with me. How could it not? It’s simple yet conveys a distinct message.

I drew this after a wonderful meeting with my favorite asshat. As her face was turning a lovely shade of puce, she accused me (among many other things) of never giving her a document I had written for her to review and approve. I told that she received a hard copy of the document at another meeting the month before. “Well, look at the pile I carry around,” pointing to a large pile papers she has with her at all times. “You can’t expect me to find it in this mess.”

My fault, I know. So, I told her the document was emailed to her prior to the aforementioned meeting. She all but called me a liar and said she would have to dig through her numerous emails, if it actually is there. She sure did not remember seeing it. If she did not get the email, then my fault and I will send to her. Which I did – forwarded the original (with her name first in the “To” line) and I made sure I copied her bosses on that, as well. Which led me to recall the line above.

Ahhh, good time, good times.

Lily Pads and Asshats…

Wet Sunglasses

This is just another version from last week’s post. Jenny suggested this one. Of course the Asshat would get miffed if a droplet got on his cool shades. Gourdo shouldn’t have made a such a big splash when the Asshat pushed him off the lily pad.

Lily Pads, Asshats and Fools, Oh My…

Lily Pads, Asshats and Fools

Figures. There is always an asshat trying to make sure you don’t move onto the next lily pad. He’s either threatened or just truly an “asshat” and enjoys effen with other people’s lives.

And there always seems to be some fool nearby having a little fun at your expense.  But really, what fool can resist a schadenfreude opportunity?